| || sakae | Friday, April 08, 2005 11:39 PM |
ok truth... i was sad dylan couldn't make it. but seriously i have no idea why. not as though i'd have anything in particular to talk about with him. actually... lots more that i can't bring up here. it's like... i don't know what to say... i just felt like being alone. i need someone to make me laugh. i need to take my mind off things. just all of a sudden i feel so drained of energy. i cannot seem to concentrate on anything. how would it have been possible for me to drift off from a conversation that involves people who mean alot to me? right now it's happenin' to me. i'm not so well... i'm home because my sister made me. perhaps i'll just sneak out later. hope she'll sleep with my parents tonight. i just don't want to be home. it's driving me crazy at the moment. so before i came home. i went to the park to walk around. sit awhile... and it reminds me of how dennis used to go there with me and what we used to talk about. those were the days... the unhappy one though. i much regretted going there just now. well i went to gb today with huiling... and no comments. i felt no difference. it's like i'm still at drill. i'm still screaming those "watch your bangs".. "look at your arm swings".. "what happened to your dressing".. "where's your ninety degrees".. "i hear dragging".. "i can't hear you".. "i want to see your jerks!".. yeah basically that's about it. huiling can't imagine what it'll be like after we leave... neither can i. oh yah did you see mdm jemaine's hair? omg it was like gold in colour? mine is i think even better than hers already. i guess this is her first time at GB in like 4 or 5 months? i can't quite catch how 48th works. i'm getting sick of everything. everything within my sight only seem to hurt more and more. i don't wanna reach out because it only cost me pain. i only know at this point in time... i believe the bond created in gb between my fellow gb mates and i... seem to be the most precious thing to me. we had joy together. we've cried together. we've spent more or less 4 years together with a common goal, common mind. we were created differently... but we fit right. we were never the best of friends.. with the exception of zijing and perhaps candice... but we know and we recognise a bond between us... that makes us special to one another... and this may never happen again in48th because times have changed. | |
사랑해요 | |